Big O

“How was the date? It must have been good, you were out all night.”

“Pretty good. Yeah. I’m going to bed.”

“Wait, Roomy, I need the details… Did you, um, have fun?”

“Maybe.”

“Did you, you know… C’mon… Fill me in.”

“Oh. I mean I would but you’re too nice for my naughty details, Church Girl.”

“Stop. You know I can’t help it. Where I come from we didn’t talk about that stuff… Much less do it. But now I need to know everything… C’mon. Fill me in.”

“Only if you ask properly.”

“I can’t… But I want to hear…”

“Ok. Goodnight, then.”

“Wait! Ok. I’ll try. Did you… Did you have… I mean did you have the big O?”

“The big O? What does that mean?”

“You know…”

“I don’t. Are you asking if we watched the Oprah Network because the answer is no. We were too busy fucking.”

“Oh. Well, that’s the big O…”

“Oral sex?”

“No.”

“Because we did that too. Are you sorry you asked yet?”

“A little but I’m working on it. I let Johnny kiss me with tongue last night.”

“Oh my, God. You were dying to tell me weren’t you.”

“So much.,. Should I let him get to first base?”

“No. But you should definitely let him feel your boobs.”

“I’m going to.”

“Babe, you gotta say it. Say: Johnny, feel my boobs…”

“Johnny, feel my boobs. Oh my gosh. Can I really say that to him?”

“Yes. You can. Because you’re breaking free from oppression and you can tell a man exactly how you want him to please you sexually. Now, are you headed to church this morning?”

“Yes. And afterward, I’m going to ask Johnny to feel my boobs.”

“Damn, girl. You got this. Ask him to kiss them also… Trust me. Next week you can let him in your pants. Now go to church and have fun. I’m headed to bed.”

“Night, Roomie.”

“Night, Church Girl.”